97 - On Pride, Friendships, and Doing It Better

The Uncommon Normal with Twyla Franz

The first “book” I wrote was How-To-Take-Over-My-Job-As-Administrative-Assistant. Clearly, I excel at taking myself too seriously.

Although I worked with wonderful people and wanted to provide the smoothest transition possible when I left to stay home with our coming-soon firstborn, I see beneath good intentions an undercurrent of pride. That I could do my job better than anyone else. That my 30-some pages of How It’s Done would actually be helpful.

Pride creeps up in other areas of my life too. Tells me to put on mascara before running errands. Say life’s good when it’s only partially true. Rise to my own unrealistic expectations. Eliminate the opportunity to be embarrassed.

It does another thing too. It affects my friendships. Gives me permission to be real about the safe stuff, but not the truest stuff. Share my already-finished stories but not the currently-happening, God-and-I-are-talking-about-this ones. Offer advice before empathy—and help without being willing to accept it myself.

A big reason we don’t know our neighbors is we’re convinced we don’t need any help. I’ll do it sick, scared, or ill-prepared before I admit I have a need, and maybe you will too. But pride-bent self-reliance sabotages relationships.

Links mentioned:

1. Cultivating a Missional Life: A 30-Day Devotional to Gently Help You Open Your Heart, Home, and Life to Your Neighbors. Download a free sample from the resource library, and if you want the rest it’s $4.99 on Kindle or $6.99 for the paperback. Grab the bonus 30-day missional living challenge (free with a purchase) to get the most out of the devotional.
2. View the written version of this episode.