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Turning 40 and Healing First Generation Wounds
Manage episode 400815499 series 3335979
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Susie Castellanos Hansley is a first-generation Mexican American who was raised by her grandmother from the age of two after her mother died, along with her siblings and cousins. Susie found school was a refuge and something she was good at. She followed the school path straight through a Ph.D. and postdoctoral studies only to find that teaching didn’t suit her, which led to years of trying to find the right professional fit. She equated her value as a person with her ability to earn an income, so these years of wandering left her in a deep depression. It wasn’t until her late 40s that she realized that her childhood trauma was affecting her personally and professionally.
Guest Bio
Susie Castellanos Hansley, Ph.D. is a speaker, workshop leader, and Master Certified Life Coach who helps high achievers reduce stress and achieve more success. She does this through one-on-one coaching as well as through speaking and workshop engagements for businesses, organizations, universities, and other groups.
As a high achiever herself - she’s a first-generation Mexican American, first in her family to go to college, earned an Ivy League Ph.D., and was a tenure-track professor - Susie had the drive, curiosity, and intelligence to be successful. But her anxiety, unresolved trauma, and imposter syndrome caused her to push herself too hard – and she burned out.
This experience led her on a quest: to help herself and other high achievers NEVER be undermined by stress again. When Susie learned about recent developments in NEUROSCIENCE and nervous system regulation, she had a EUREKA moment: “My stress, overwhelm, and imposter syndrome aren’t signs something is ‘wrong’ with me - I just hadn't learned HOW to work WITH my nervous system!”
Now that Susie knows how to REGULATE her nervous system and DE-STRESS, she helps other high achievers do the same - so they can achieve their goals while feeling GREAT doing it.
Susie’s clients go from anxious and stressed to confident, certain, and calm – which allows them to stop wasting emotional energy and become more productive, accomplished, and fulfilled in their work, relationships, and lives.
Turning 40 and Healing First Generation Wounds
In this episode of the Forty Drinks Podcast, host Stephanie McLaughlin talks to Susie Castellanos Hansley, a first-generation Mexican American who was raised by her grandmother from the age of two, along with her siblings and cousins, after her mother died. Susie didn’t understand how her childhood trauma was affecting her personally and professionally until the Covid lockdown. She was using the Clubhouse app to connect with other people and entered a room on anxiety that blew her mind. She asked, “Is it possible for you to have anxiety and not know you have anxiety?” She found out it was. That led her to uncover the trauma of growing up in poverty with an abuela who had her own unhealed traumas. Susie shares her journey of navigating various career paths, dealing with trauma and anxiety, and finding her passion in coaching. She discusses the importance of understanding the nervous system and how trauma can impact our lives. Susie also emphasizes the power of having a compassionate witness and finding your “pack” of supportive individuals.
Highlights from the episode:
- Susie's journey of academic achievement and trying many different careers, plus her feelings of failure that led to a 15-year midlife slump.
- Confusing her value as a person with her ability to make money.
- The realization that she had trauma and anxiety and the importance of finding a compassionate witness.
- Discovering the power of the nervous system in healing trauma and understanding triggers.
- The role of shame in suppressing emotions and the importance of un-shaming ourselves.
- Finding your “pack” of supportive individuals who can be compassionate witnesses.
If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend, or consider rating the Forty Drinks Podcast.
Guest Resources
Susie’s Gift to Forty Drinks Listeners: Which High Achiever Archetype Are You? (Personality Quiz)
Topics Mentioned in our Conversation
Forty Drinks episode with Mitch Webb, or Episode 73 on the podcast platforms
Information on the Human Givens School
Susie’s former trauma therapist - Colleen Sodano
Irene Lyon - nervous system healing
Do you have the Midlife Ick?
Download Stephanie’s guide to the Ick to diagnose whether you or someone you love is suffering from this insidious midlife malaise. www.fortydrinks.com/ick
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The Forty Drinks Podcast is produced and presented by Savoir Faire Marketing/Communications
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