So These People Have Stormed The Capitol - Bonus

Good Morning Mayberry

In this steaming hot take bonus episode, learn about how Shift got a unicorn coloring book and 152 crayons and that's the biggest news of the week. Ryan, however, saw many hours of mainstream news so he's here to discuss the sycophantic coverage of the most boring wannabe coup ever. Shift informs the world that "leftist" white women and gays tried to sully Horny Twitter by disappointing everything again "simping for nazi dick" then he absolutely flips out when Ryan tells him the news said the furwearing bonehead was with "antifa" but never mentioned his affiliation with Q.

Shift bumbles through Ryan's explanation of wtf an impeachment is then wonders if this is all actually a sloppy false flag to increase bluewave lawyercop lover fascism.

As we look up the words "insurgency", "revolution", "fascist", "far-right", Shift snaps at Google and Dictionary.com for concealing extended definitions. Come explore with us if it's possible to be and "insurgent" and a "fascist" at the same time based on the math that a "fascist" must be "far-right" and "far-right" means preservation of "tradition" and "existing views/institutions"... and "insurgents" overthrow existing institutions. Meh, maybe we're off the rail. Who could know.

A friendly reminder that Shift doesn't give a shit about any of this shit so if you're gonna get all triggered by a black queer radical community healer cackling about that woman getting shot to death, go do something else.

Tip your good ol asshole host, Shift Orion, on CashApp $iamshift.