Franchisees Podcastleri

"Help! Help! Somebody help me! If you can read this, send help! I'm a fat little German boy and I'm stuck in the chocolate pipe! Please for the love of god help me, I've been here for days! I can't feel my legs! I can't feel my legs! Oh my god I'm going to die here! I'm going to die like this! Oh god! Oh god save me, please! I can't eat anymore cho…

Hello listeners, we've got a ballad to sing to you, I hope you don't find that cringe! Special guest Mary Jane joins us again to talk about the latest instalment of the popular young adult dystopian sci-fi series The Hunger Games. It's a prequel so we've got a whole new cast of characters and fresh faces. Does this film justify its own existence? E…

Another double feature for all you weirdo arrested development YA freaks! That's right, The Franchisees are back with HG: MJ 1+2 with very special guest and Hunger Games aficionado, Mary Jane. MJ suggested this series in the first place, so it's great to have her guide us through the latter half of this dystopian franchise. Should they have split t…

New franchise alert! Two movies in one episode? Can it be done? Turns out, yes it can, quite easily. After some unforeseen issues and delays we've decided to truncate our Hunger Games series into 3 episodes so as not to mess with our extremely tight and rigid schedule. And if you have a problem with that go fly a kite and also go fuck yourself. Joi…

A Halloween Special in November? That's right. And if you don't like it, your beloved Simpsons used to do it all the time so stop complaining! For the past few years Alex and Ben and our friend also named Ben had a Halloween movie marathon at the end of October. This year we decided to make audio content out of it! Ben wasn't able to join unfortuna…

*****Thank you for listening and we're sorry there was no episode last week. We'll make it up to you with this long episode and some more bonus eps coming up soon. We love you.***** *****WARNING: There is nothing particularly 'X-rated' about this episode despite the sensational title.*****The Franchisees tarafından oluşturuldu

Ben got cropped. Chris Rock got slapped. These things happen and who can really say who was in the wrong and who was in the right? All we can do is analyze these moments again and again and again until they finally become clear. We're back with the penultimate episode of our long-running, award-winning series on the epic 10-part anime SAW... this i…

The Final Chapter my ass. The Saw Series continues after a long hiatus with the 2017 sequel/prequel/spinoff Jigsaw directed by the Spierig Brothers. Jigsaw is terrorizing Toronto yet again, this time trapping a group of sinners in a barn somewhere. Canadian acting icon Callum Keith Rennie is on the case. Not a great movie! Join us next week for Chr…

A silly episode for a silly movie. Good silly! We had a lot of fun with this Extremely Goofy Movie that attempts to wrap up the series with a slightly more heightened style than your average Saw (which is really saying something). Kevin Greutert is back and thank god Twisted Pictures forced him into it. Jigsaw/Hoffman/Dr. Cary Elwes take their reve…

We're back with an action-packed, double/triple guested, too long episode! Thank you for joining us for the sixth part in the epic ten-part anime series, Saw. Saw VI is easily among the best in the series and we all loved it. Longtime editor of the Saw films Kevin Greutert takes over directing duties for the first time and does a superlative job. W…

Congratulations! You've made it halfway through our series on the epic ten-part anime franchise SAW. Good for you, well done. Friend of the pod Devin Shears joins us this week to discuss Saw V, a film which makes the bizarre decision to focus less on the traps and more on the... character development? Give us what we want! This is a very cheap-look…

We're back with another entry in our series on the epic 10-part anime SAW series. This one's a doozy, we've got so much to discuss. We don't even get to talking about Saw IV until an hour in! Ben and Alex give their thoughts on some hot new flicks coming out of the Toronto International Film Festival (including Harmony Korine's much anticipated AGG…

We're back, Darren Lynn Bousman is back, and our special guest Katherine Vienneau is back! Where does the epic 10-part anime Saw series go after the boring and bad Saw II? Can returning director DLB step up his twisted game for this sequel? Yes, oh lord yes! Saw III is the true beginning of the Saw sequel madness! We got Jigsaw, we got Amanda, we g…

We return with part two of our series on the epic ten-part anime series, Saw. Does this sequel have two times the torture, two times the traps, two times the grime? Or does it completely suck? Listen to find out! Alex and Ben get trapped in a Toronto nerve gas house thanks to the new Saw series landlord, Darren Lynn Bousman. Can his scripting and d…

"I want to play a game. Listener... your whole life, um... no ok, uh *clears throat* the last few months of your life you've been listening to The Franchisees podcast... now, um... now you're trapped in a uh... ok I don't actually want to play a game right now... I am too tired." New franchise alert! We are beginning our epic series on the 10-part …

Ben and Al reunite - not that you would have noticed. Thank god we've finally made it to the finish line of the Ninja Turtles franchise. There were some highs and lows, mostly lows, but we're ending the series with a bang. Canadian dopesmoker Seth Rogen has done it again! Mutant Mayhem is not only a fun animated movie, it is perhaps the greatest pi…

We're comin' out! Out of the shadows that is. Yep, there's another Ninja Turtles movie: this one is the sequel to the reboot from 2014 that sucked. Is Out of the Shadows an improvement? Yes it is, in nearly every way. Zanier, funnier, closer to a live-action cartoon adaptation than a soulless, gritty reboot. *Charlie Rose voice* "We have Bebop. We …

Welcome back! 7 long years have passed since TMNT (2007) graced the big screen. Hundreds of people hard at work, scripting, planning, crafting, animating... and this is what they came up with. This week we're talking about the monstrous Michael Bay-produced series reboot from 2014 and we have a very special guest who eagle-eared listeners may recog…

What an episode we have for you this week. Is it about the 2007 computer animated Ninja Turtles movie TMNT? Well, partly. We get to it eventually, around an hour in. It's just not a very good or interesting movie unfortunately. Not really much to talk about! But that's ok, because many other exciting things have been happening. Ben had a real life …

Boring ass movie alert! The Turtles go back in time... sounds like a blast from the past, eh? Well it's not, it's boring as shit! Join Alex and Ben as they struggle to come up with things to say about Turtles in Time. How could they mess this up? Sending the Turtles to Feudal Japan sounds great on paper, right? Unfortunately, this film is bogged do…

"Go Ninja Go Ninja Go!" These are the immortal words of the Jim Henson Creature Shop rapping animatronic they named Vanilla Ice. He's in this movie and, unfortunately, in one of the more fun parts. The turtles are back to kick some shell, having been out of theatres for a whole year. Released at arguably the height of Turtlemania, is this a bigger …

New franchise time! The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is one of the biggest and most profitable media franchises of all time. Comics, toys, TV series, movies... all perfectly intertwined to make maximum money. But does this sellout series have any heart? Is our nostalgia for the four lads from NYC enough to get us through these films for children? T…

Hot new release movie coming at you fresh off the resurrected legacy sequel pipeline. We saw Dial of Destiny opening night and recorded our thoughts just for you because we love you. How does Indy 5 stack up against the other films in the series? Is it as disappointing as the Cannes critics said it was? And what exactly is this Dial of Destiny? All…

Join the Franchisees as we climb into the lead-lined fridge and survive the nuclear blast that is Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Is this film as bad as its reputation? Or is it a secret masterpiece? Or is it perhaps some sort of third thing? Paul joins us again to revisit a film we all last saw in theatres when we were young adults. Now that we're o…

Happy Father's Day! Last Crusade conveniently landed on this important day where we all remember to call our father figures and acknowledge their existence. In his third and, at one point in many of our living memories, final adventure, Indiana Jones is paired up with his estranged dad, Sean Connery. Can they work together to find the Holy Grail be…

***the following episode description has been written in the style of everyone's favourite Temple of Doom character, Willie*** AHHHHH! OH MY GOD, THERE'S NO PILOT!!! AHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! INDY! AHHHHHHH! FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, THERE'S A KID DRIVING THE CAR!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AHHHHHHHHH!! THERE ARE TWO DEAD PEOPLE IN HERE! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! O…

BONUS BONUS BONUS Ben has now seen every film directed by writer/director, film critic, and legendary Facebook poster Paul Schrader. For that reason, as well as the release of Master Gardener, The Franchisees have recorded some emergency bonus content ranking every Paul Schrader-directed film. Is this episode just a long and barely coherent rant by…

The Franchisees are back with a new, exciting franchise: the Indian Jones films! Action, adventure, romance, and goofball gags galore. Directed by friend of the pod Steven Spielberg (FKA Sammy Fabelman), the first film in the series Raiders of the Lost Ark is considered to be one of the greatest action-adventure films of all time. A non-stop thrill…

Jackie Chan and Owen Wilson... the two best buddies in cinema history are back! This time they're on a new adventure to jolly old Londontown where they save the day with a little help from a few famous English friends. Special guest Jordan Seccareccia is back to accompany Alex and Ben on this nostalgic journey across the pond. Shanghai Knights is t…

We're back this week with a new franchise: everyone's favourite Jackie Chan action buddy comedy series... Shanghai Noon? That's right, The Franchisees are watching the superior (to Rush Hour) attempt at giving global action superstar Jackie Chan a fun American franchise. Are these two films the greatest American movies of Jackie's career? Alex and …

The Franchisees wrap up another series with the final film in the Godfather trilogy, The Godfather Part III. Is it the worst in the series? Yes. But is it a "bad" film overall? No! Part III has a bit of a stink on it and Alex and Ben talk about why that might be. Ben had never seen this movie before, his many attempts thwarted throughout the years …

The Franchisees are back to discuss what is often called "the greatest sequel of all time." Is that true? Better than Paranormal Activity 2? You'll have to listen to find out! Joining us to talk about The Godfather Part II is filmmaker and script supervisor Aidan Payne (featuring a special off-mic appearance/laugh track from past and future guest J…

On this week's episode of The Franchisees we tackle a little known Italian-American gem: The Godfather. It's a classic. Francis Ford Coppola. We have no choice but to stan. Join us for this new series as we discuss the Godfather trilogy, the work of Fjord Coppola, the legendary actors and collaborators, and the story of movie magic on the Paramount…

We just couldn't talk about Pier Paolo Pasolini's "Trilogy of Life" without devoting an episode to his final film, his masterpiece, his first in a proposed "Trilogy of Death"... Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom. One of the most infamous and controversial films of all time, Salò is a brutal and uncompromising work that, due to his murder mere weeks be…

One Thousand and One Nights. These hot stories go back, way back, possibly being the genesis of every horny yarn you've ever heard! Who better to adapt them than friend of the pod Pier Paolo Pasolini? Alex and Ben are back to discuss the third and final film in Pasolini's Trilogy of Life, Arabian Nights. The erotic tales are told out of order and w…

The bawdiness and ribaldry continue in the second film of Pier Paolo Pasolini's Trilogy of Life, The Canterbury Tales. My god, what a picture! The stench coming off this thing, good lord! Alex and Ben dive head first into the shit, piss, cum, and vomit and come out the other side realizing that this film is a stone cold masterpiece. We love you Nin…

Spring has sprung! And there's no better way to get in the mood than joining The Franchisees for Pasolini April. We're discussing the life and work of Italian poet, author, intellectual, and filmmaker Pier Paolo Pasolini, a great artist who may not have technically directed a "franchise" but did make a "thematic trilogy" with his three thematically…

Join us for a special bonus episode (we had some time left on the podcast meter). Alex and Ben finally talk about Die Hart and other movies they've been watching recently. There's also a special video game corner for all you "gamers" out there. Special bonus for our special listeners. We love you! xoxoxo…

Yeah, we're thinking we're back (for the 4th and final(?) time). Alex, Ben, and returning guest Joel all saw the new John Wick movie this weekend and convened in The Franchisees Studio to have a fittingly long, discursive chat about the bloated and goated action epic. Osaka. Berlin. Paris. Toronto. John Wick is everywhere these days. He's joined in…

Yeah, I'm thinking we're back (again). John Wick returns in Chapter 3 - Parabellum and we've googled the dual meaning of that title so YOU don't have to! Alex, Ben and their special guest Joel Edmiston (@joeledmiston) talk about the late great Lance Reddick, an underwhelming Oscars ceremony (no slaps), Halle Berry and her tactical attack dogs, and …

2 times the action, 2 times the stunts, 2 times the Wick, 2 times the MARTY. The Franchisees (and special guest Marty) are back with an episode covering the second entry in the Book of John Wick - John Wick: Chapter 2! Alex, Ben and Marty discuss the surreal joys of watching Keanu Reeves blow people's heads off, the excellent cameo by friend of the…

A new franchise is like a bullet in the head (but in a good way)... and nobody is better at putting bullets in heads like our man (and friend of the pod) John Wick. That's right, Alex and Ben are entering the shadow world of assassins to talk about the popular action franchise John Wick. The boys are joined by special guest Marty to talk about Kean…

Three cheers for perhaps the most hastily put together sequel we've had the pleasure of covering on this show! Wayne and Garth are back and this time they're planning a giant concert in their hometown. Will any of the bands show up? Will it be a huge success or a crushing failure? Or perhaps something in between... is comedy gold hidden amongst the…

Coming at you pralines and dick style from the post-apocalyptic ruins of the once fair city of John Tory-less Toronto: it's party time, it's excellent, schwing, I fear change, did you ever find Bugs Bunny attractive when he put on a dress and played girl bunny? Get ready to relive all these lovable bits and more because our new franchise is Wayne's…

SMOOTH! It's a late-nite episode: The Franchisees After Dark. Alex, Ben, and special guest Katie are coming straight from the movie theatre to your ears! We left our studio to check out the newly released and, presumably, final film in our franchise: Magic Mike's Last Dance. How does this finale compare to the previous films? Hear our fresh-out-the…

We're back and we've brought some friends along with us! An XXL movie deserves an XXL episode so joining the pod are two very special, highly distinguished guests: Mary Jane and Jesse. The four of us talk about the extremely pleasurable sequel to Magic Mike (Magic Mike XXL) and also discuss stripping, thirstiness and our awkward high school days. W…

Onto our next new franchise: Magic Mike! Whoever said "you can't make a movie about male strippers AND the Great Recession" obviously never met our personal hero (and friend of the pod) Steven Soderbergh. We talk about Soderbergh, star and real-life Magic Mike, Channing Tatum, and of course co-star Matthew McConaughey. Have you been waiting for us …

We're back with a bumper episode between franchises! Our two biggest heroes Bruce Willis and Kevin Smith return to deliver an impressively unfunny big studio comedy, Cop Out. In this episode we explore the world of Kevin Smith, his relationship to Willis, his love affair with weed, and his apparent inability to direct a good movie. In the second ha…

"Yippee Ki-Yay Mother Russia" John McClane is BACK for the LAST time ever! And this time it's personal because his sidekick is little John McClane Jr. aka Jai Courtney aka Captain Boomerang aka Jai Boomerang. The McClanes are tasked with saving the world yet again, this time by taking down some bad guys in Russia. Is this the worst Die Hard sequel?…

aka Die Hard 4.0 aka Live Más or Die Hard The Franchisees are back with the long gap sequel Live Free or Die Hard! This one features the scariest terrorist of all: the world wide web! Can working class, blue collar luddite John McClane figure out how to log on, download, and surf/save the web? Perhaps with a little help from his coolest sidekick ye…