Life with a narcissist is challenging, and Dr. Les Carter is here to assist. Whether you are feeling frustrated due to a narcissist's inability to blend well or you are feeling constantly invalidated by their need for control and their lack of empathy, Dr. C is your resource. He is committed to helping people become part of Team Healthy, which focuses on DRC: dignity, respect, and civility. In each of our episodes we will contrast the narcissistic patterns of life to the ways of Team Healthy.
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Detoxing From A Narcissist, featuring Natalie Jambazian
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Dr. C welcomes therapist and author, Natalie Jambazian who recently released the book, Detoxing From A Narcissist. She describes the nature of toxicity common in narcissistic relationships and offers practical insights for becoming self-empowered. Natalie Jambazian, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and self-love and narcissistic abuse recov…
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What's Going On With The Narcissistic Bully In Your Life featuring Bill Eddy
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Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your online presence and start your free 14-day trial at https://aura.com/DrCarter Sign up for Dr. Carter’s NEW course: Ready, Set, Connect https://courses.survivingnarcissism.tv/courses/ready-set-connect Get 30% off when you use the coupon code: SNCommunity30 Dr. Les Carter is a best selling au…
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What Do Narcissists Gain By Belittling You?
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Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help #sponsored Sign up for Dr. Carter’s NEW course: Ready, Set, Connect https://courses.survivingnarcissism.tv/courses/ready-set-connect Get 30% off when you use the coupon code: SNCom…
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Breaking Free From Trauma Bonds, featuring Dr. Nadine Macaluso
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Dr. Les Carter is joined by Dr. Nadine Macaluso who specializes in treating relationship trauma and C-PTSD. Her personal story was depicted in the movie, The Wolf Of Wall St. starring Leonardo DiCaprio. Actress Margot Robbie’s played the role based on Nadine’s life. Once she broke away from her harrowing experiences, she took time to heal, eventual…
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Healthy Versus Unhealthy Boundaries, Featuring Terri Cole
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Dr. C welcomes therapist Terri Cole who has worked with many individuals seeking to find appropriate relationship boundaries. She lays out many of the do’s and don’ts of managing boundaries, with the idea that it’s each person’s responsibility to oneself to be authentic. Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment …
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Narcissistic Families That Resemble Cults, Featuring Meredith Miller
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Dr. C interviews Meredith Miller who helps individuals traumatized by highly authoritarian family systems. Her psychological thrust goes beyond surviving, but in helping survivors shed the victim’s mindset so they can move fully into a rewarding adult identity. To find more of Meredith’s resources, visit https://www.innerintegration.com/. Thank you…
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Strategies Narcissists Use To Minimize Your Self-Trust, featuring Dr. Ramani Durvasula
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Dr. C is joined by Dr. Ramani Durvasula, who discusses information from her latest book, It’s Not You. Specifically, she walks us through some of the most common ways narcissists whittle at your capacity to trust in yourself. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matc…
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Why Narcissists Can’t Admit Being Wrong? Featuring Guy Winch
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Dr. C has an enlightening discussion with Dr. Guy Winch about narcissists who simply cannot say: “I was wrong.” Dr. Winch identifies multiple reasons they have this difficulty, then discusses our best responses. To find more of Dr. Winch’s resources, go to https://www.guywinch.com/. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your online …
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If You Had Controlling Parents, featuring Dr. Dan Neuharth
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Dr. C is joined by Dr. Dan Neuharth who speaks into the topic of the fallout from controlling parents. His kind manner makes his wonderful insights quite easy to digest. If you had difficulties at the hands of a parent, there is hope. You can find out more about Dr. Neuharth at his website: https://www.drdanmftcounseling.com/ To read his articles i…
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A Narcissist's Coercive Control, featuring Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola
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Dr. C interviews Dr. Christine Cocchiola about her vital work with survivors of coercive control. She discusses how people can unwittingly become trapped in coercive relationships, then discusses a multitude of ways to address it therapeutically. Check out Dr. Cocchiola’s resources here: https://www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com/ Thank you to Aura …
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Building The Self You Were Never Allowed To Have, Featuring Jerry Wise
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Therapist Jerry Wise and Dr. Les Carter discuss how many people have been required to fit into an unhealthy narcissistic system, meaning they were discouraged from being who they really are. In this engaging discussion Jerry discusses how to reverse that trend as you embark on your path of self-discovery. For the past 45 years, Jerry Wise has helpe…
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A Narcissist's Underdeveloped Conscience
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Your conscience is that inner voice reflecting your values and morality. Ideally it would be developed in the context of empathy and respect. Narcissists, however, tend to lean toward one extreme or another regarding matters of the conscience. They can be very rigid or they can be very loose. Either way, relationships suffer. Dr. Les Carter will br…
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The Trait That Eventually Reveals Covert Narcissism
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Initially when you encounter a covert narcissist, you can be impressed by their seeming normalcy or charm. Living behind the veneer of the False Self, they have learned how to play the game of looking nice. But over time, one trait keeps showing up that alerts you to something more sinister. Being defined by selfishness and control, this pattern wi…
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The Blending Of Narcissists And Codependency, Featuring Darlene Lancer
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Dr. C welcomes author and therapist, Darlene Lancer, whose expertise is the exploration of narcissists, codependents, and the problem of shame. She explains how necessary it is to be aware of a narcissist's dominance, especially if you are inclined to lay aside your true self in deference to the controller.Darlene Lancer is a Licensed Marriage and …
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When Narcissists Refuse To Accept Your Boundaries, Featuring Dr. Jamie Zuckerman
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Narcissists are threatened by you being distinctly you. This means they predictably use distorted thinking when you declare that you deserve respect, that you should be able to follow your own plans. Our guest, Dr. Jamie Zuckerman, explains how essential it is to know the intentions of narcissists as you then determine inwardly how you will proceed…
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What Dominant Narcissists Don't Want You To Know
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Many narcissists make it their task to establish dominance and power. Dr. Les Carter explains, though, that such an effort is driven by many unresolved issues they don't want to reveal. Even when they refuse to come to terms with who they really are, you can learn to see through their facade, determining to respond with a very different mindset. Go…
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Healing From Toxic Relationships, Featuring Dr. Stephanie Sarkis
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Dr. C speaks with Dr. Stephanie Sarkis about her book that describes how to recognize toxic relationship patterns so you can focus instead on staying true to who you need to be. Her insights and wisdom are sure to be beneficial. You can find Dr. Sarkis on her website: https://stephaniesarkis.com/. You can purchase her book, Healing From Toxic Relat…
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Narcissists Show Who They Are In Conflicts
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It's easy to be pleasant and friendly when you are in agreement with others. But Dr. C highlights how your level of maturity is on display in the midst of conflict. He discusses a narcissist's starting point when you have differences, then gives a stark contrast by identifying the healthy alternatives. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissi…
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The Conniving Sociopath, Featuring Dr. Jane McCartney
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Dr. C has an enlightening discussion with Dr. Jane McCartney from London as they break down the problems associated with sociopathic individuals. She has a wealth of information on this vital topic. Dr. McCartney is a Consultant Chartered Psychologist in the UK, working with a wide range of patients and clients. She has previously worked for the NH…
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Setting Boundaries with a Narcissist, Featuring Dr. Henry Cloud
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Dr. Henry Cloud joins Dr. C today as he discusses ideas about the need for boundaries in key relationships. You can find Dr. Cloud at https://www.drcloud.com/. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help #sponsored You can f…
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The Empath And The Narcissist...Lots Of Questions
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Recently, Dr. C recorded a webinar about the empath and the narcissist, and specifically he focused upon the necessity of maintaining healthy boundaries. In today's podcast he answers multiple questions generated by that webinar. If you want to purchase the resale of the webinar, go to https://survivingnarcissism.tv/webinar-the-empaths-superpower/.…
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The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist, Featuring Debbie Mirza
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Today Dr. C interviews author Debbie Mirza on her book, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist. She describes what this pattern consists of, and the two of them discuss ways to stay out of their unique manipulations.To learn more about Debbie, visit her website at https://www.debbiemirza.com/.If you are interested in online therapy, Dr. Carter ha…
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The Genius Of Empathy, Featuring Dr. Judith Orloff
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Dr. C welcomes psychiatrist and best-selling author, Dr. Judith Orloff. She has a deep history of studying and writing about the strengths inherent in the empathic approach to relationships. Their discussion focuses on understanding what is at stake when narcissists attempt to minimize the healthy ingredients of an empath. To learn more about Dr. O…
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The Least Narcissistic Person I've Ever Met
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Dr. C takes a detour from his normal talks about narcissism, describing a very difficult time in his own deep history. During this time, he encountered an unusual man, Miguel, who could almost be described as an angel in disguise. He was the exact opposite of the narcissistic people Dr. C has encountered on so many occasions. Go to https://betterhe…
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Why Do Narcissists Have To Be So Right?
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A common identifier of narcissism is the inability to receive input, as well as a refusal to tune into others' feelings and perceptions. Dr. Les Carter explains that behind such a pattern is a deeper issue...Narcissists have declared themselves to be the keepers of truth. They must be right. The more you can see through a narcissist's need to lord …
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Slay The Bully, Featuring Rebecca Zung
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Dr. C welcomes Rebecca Zung who has just released a new book, Slay The Bully, How To Negotiate With A Narcissist And Win. Being a family law attorney specializing in high conflict cases, she brings a wealth of information to the table as she explains the SLAY method of responding with narcissists. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpod…
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The Two Sides To A Narcissistic Trauma Bond
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Trauma bonding inside unhealthy relationships arises as the recipient experiences ongoing emotional overload. Dr. Les Carter describes how you can break the bond by understanding what the narcissist hopes to gain, then by identifying and living into your best version of yourself. You can succeed in defining who you want to be, separate from the nar…
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A Narcissist's Profound Insecurity
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Narcissists, being fully committed to the False Self, want you to assume they are the ones with the answers, when in fact, they are deeply insecure. In this episode, Dr. C responds to questions he has received from listeners for the purpose of showing you some of the many ways narcissists display their inner tension. They can't come to terms with t…
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A Narcissist's Aggressive And Manipulative Tactics, featuring Jim Brillon
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A defining feature of narcissism is the willingness to manipulate. And because of other issues like the need for control, an attitude of entitlement, and raw selfishness, it is predictable that they will have serious anger issues too. Not a good combination. Dr. Les Carter welcomes therapist Jim Brillon who will discuss in detail how to maneuver th…
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Rethinking Narcissism, Featuring Dr. Craig Malkin
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Dr. Les Carter shares an insightful interview with psychologist Dr. Craig Malkin, who is a lecturer at the Harvard Medical School in Cambridge, Massachusetts, and who also maintains an active therapy practice. Dr. Malkin explains how narcissism is a combination of inborn temperament and learned patterns, and also discusses why they have such diffic…
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Narcissists Are Defined By Psychological Laziness
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A hallmark of the mature personality is the willingness to take responsibility for who you are. Mature people understand that every stage of life presents challenges, and they welcome the process of introspection as they determine how to wisely respond. Narcissists, however, refuse to do the hard work of finding insight and making adjustments. Inst…
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Why Does A Narcissist NEED To Keep You Deflated?
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Narcissists are predators who are quite willing to exploit and use you for their own personal gain. Dr. C describes their mindset as they engage with you, then he also identifies cues they look for to determine if indeed you will susceptible to their schemes. As you see through their patterns it will position you to remain true to yourself, staying…
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The Emotional Chaos Narcissists Bring To You, featuring Kati Morton
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While narcissists try to present themselves as all together, behind the scenes there is much unfinished business they carry. Dr. C talks with special guest Kati Morton about what drives narcissists and how we can maintain emotional steadiness despite their lack of it. You can find Kati on her website, https://katimorton.com/. You can follow Kati on…
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Narcissists Carry Pervasive Neediness Inside
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Narcissists like to give the impression that they have life figured out and that you should defer to their mandates. Dr. Les Carter offers a very different perspective, discussing how they are actually profoundly needy and act as they do because they have not learned to come to terms with life's challenges. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnar…
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The Impact Of Trauma Bonding On The Body, Featuring Caroline Strawson
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Dr. C welcomes trauma specialist Caroline Strawson who explains how trauma bonding to a narcissist impacts you physiologically. Having a history in the medical profession as well as surviving her own traumatic experiences, she brings a wealth of information and insight into this vital topic. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure you…
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How To Spot A Toxic Narcissist, featuring Dr. Kerry McAvoy
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Dr. C is joined by Dr. Kerry McAvoy, author of Love You More. She clearly describes some primary signs to watch for as you determine the level of toxicity in a narcissist. As you understand how their outward actions are an indication of inner turmoil, you can learn not to be pulled in by their manipulations. Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingna…
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Why Are Narcissists So Combative?
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The longer you engage with narcissists, the more they illustrate how internally conflicted they are. But instead of using healthy introspection, they turn outward as they try to make you responsible for their personal turmoil. Dr. C discusses this phenomenon by emphasizing that you are not required to enter into their combative games. Instead, you …
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Believing Me: Healing From Narcissistic Abuse, featuring Dr. Ingrid Clayton
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Go to https://betterhelp.com/survivingnarcissismpodcast for 10% off your first month of therapy with BetterHelp and get matched with a therapist who will listen and help #sponsored Dr. Ingrid Clayton joins Dr. C in discussing her own history of trauma and abuse and how it has impacted her. She is a talented therapist who specializes in trauma recov…
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Why Narcissists Cannot Grow
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If you are a healthy person, you know you are a work in progress. You seek input. You contemplate insights. You embrace accountability. Dr. Les Carter reminds you that such an approach is anathema to narcissists who instead will thwart others' efforts to discuss improvements. As a result, they persist in all sorts of maladaptive behaviors. Thank yo…
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How Narcissists Try To Rob You Of You
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Illogical as it may be, narcissists approach their closest relationships with the goal of emptying you of yourself, filling you instead with themselves. Dr. Les Carter outlines the many tactics they use, and explains their profoundly insecure reasoning. Your task is to become aware of their aims, then leaning into your uniqueness as fully as possib…
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Fierce Love As An Alternative To Narcissism, Featuring Dr. Jacqui Lewis
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Dr. Jacqui Lewis is a highly respected author and speaker who recently published the book, Fierce Love. She and Dr. C discuss how she learned to move away from toxic relationships by becoming devoted to the practice of love…beginning with oneself, then toward others, and then in the public arena. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secur…
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Why Do Narcissists Need You As A Foil?
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In the best case scenario, as you build relationships, you will be honest about your strengths and your weaknesses. Narcissists, however, are schemers attempting to establish superiority, and are not interested in honest relationships. In fact, their posturing is done for the purpose of setting themselves up as the gold standard, with you being the…
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Breaking Free From A Narcissist, featuring Dr. Ramani Durvasula
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Recently Dr. Les Carter interviewed Dr. Ramani Durvasula about how to break free from a narcissist. In this wide ranging discussion you’ll get to know more fully what she considers the greatest challenges as you become separate and distinct in your manner of participating in relationships. Thank you to Aura for sponsoring this episode. Secure your …
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How To Interpret A Narcissist's Anger
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On the surface, narcissists can appear decent or cooperative, but that falls apart when tension and anger arise inside relationships. Dr. Les Carter explains how narcissists carry many internal, dysfunctional patterns that show up in moments of conflict, so it is essential to know what you are up against. Pulling back the curtain, he explains how t…
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The Absurdity Of A Narcissist's Entitlement
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Central to the pattern of narcissism is an ongoing attitude of entitlement. Dr. Les Carter breaks down this topic by explaining the many ways this trait impacts the narcissist's interactions with you. As you clearly understand the lack of common sense associated with their entitlement, you can choose to step away from the "requirements" the narciss…
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An Honest Alternative to Narcissism, featuring David Zahl
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David Zahl is the author of a new book, Low Anthropology, which describes the need to be authentic and honest in the ways relate, as opposed to creating and maintaining an ideal image of oneself. They discuss the need for letting go of the need to falsely impress, choosing an approach to relationships that embraces each other’s True Self. Thank you…
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Should You Fear The Narcissist?
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Inevitably, when you have ongoing interactions with a narcissist, you learn that these individuals do not operate with positive intentions toward you. So should you fear the narcissist? Dr. Les Carter answers, yes and no. You should have a healthy fear that prompts you to use realistic care and caution. But, then he explains that they too harbor mu…
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Is Narcissism The Same As Evil?
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Narcissism is identified by selfishness, the need for control, a feeling of superiority, a lack of empathy, and manipulative behaviors. So, as you attempt to understand it fully, you may wonder if it means that person is given over to evil intentions. Dr. C explains how there is a great overlap between narcissism and evil, and gives a thorough work…
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What Drives A Malignant Narcissist
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30:52
On the far end of the narcissistic spectrum is the Malignant Narcissist. These people have the traits we know to be common among narcissists, but in exaggerated extremes. Dr. Les Carter breaks down this pattern of life so you can know how they think and what motivates them. The more you understand their internal troubles, the better you can make as…
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The Many Faces Of A Narcissist's Control
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32:04
At its best, the desire to be in control can lead to qualities like reliability, responsibility, organization, and completion of tasks. But when narcissists attempt to be in control, their self-absorption and entitlement leads them into all sorts of less-than-desirable behaviors and attitudes. Dr. C teaches you how to know when a narcissist is in h…
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