This is the Blank String podcast, staring Luke, Tim and Matt as they talk about things and stuff and junk and things.
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Blank String Pick The Best Game For Kids
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Picking an all-around accessible and great game for children is tough. Really tough and game designers don't understand what a teeny tiny human needs from a game. Guided by Matt and Luke who have kids, and Tim who has money, we work out the ultimate game for children. The answer may surprise you!
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Blank String Solve The Novel Corona Virus Pandemic
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Sorry, we didn't get around to it sooner, but we thought we'd take a crack at solving the current pandemic. Put your fears aside as we have finally solved it! You can go back outside with your loved ones after following our advice (for legal and sensible reasons do not follow our "advice"). We also talk about the Matrix trailer, that looks so amazi…
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Blank String Take To The Skies
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Matt and Luke try not to spend money, mainly so their pesky kids can eat and wear clothes and have a roof over theirs heads. Tim on the other hand has plenty of disposable income because he does not have those things to spend money on. Did we do something wrong along the way? Regardless of our life choices, Tim has some really cool stuff! We learn …
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Blank String Take On The Shiny Crustaceans III
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The final part of the Shiny Crustations. Thodus, Lesleigh, Helga and Fabian made their way through a tortuous trap and into the back of the cave to discover the source of the magical crabs. What they find will change the history of the Blank String Faction in ways that are unimaginable, even for this DM.…
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Blank String Take On The Shiny Crustaceans II
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Disclaimer: It happened again! We lost an episode due to technical issues. In the missing episode Thodus, Lesleigh and Helga made their way to a cave where the crabs came from and met a young person named Fabian and with his remarkable skills, he created a massive crab robot which created a new hole in the cave. In this episode, Thodus, Lesleigh, H…
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Blank String Take On The Shiny Crustaceans I
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Disclaimer: The previous episode broke whilst recording so we are missing that episode. To fill you in, Thodus and Lesleigh finished their previous mission, they spent their time in between having a bit of a break. They picked up a new job to track down where magical crabs have been coming from as it sounds like Blank String origin. They are joined…
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Blank String Faction Winter Games Part II
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Continue with this winter's festivities! We finish the game of Pin the Tail on the unicorn with a very comedic and satisfying results then move onto Kobold, Kobold, Sorcerer where Lesleigh (Tim) is the Sorcerer and Thodus (Matt), all the dwarves and Klaus turn into crazy skittish Kobolds. Who will win? What prizes does everyone get? Tune in and fin…
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Blank String Faction Winter Games Part I
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Thodus (Matt) and Lesleigh (Tim) celebrate this winters festivities by joining the Blank String faction in a couple of games. Several games including "Catch the Magic Mushroom" where the first person to catch the mushroom wins, no other rules exist. Then they start the game of "Pin the Tail on the Unicorn". Grab some snacks, sit back and listen in …
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Blank String Tour the Blank String Faction HQ
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After successfully getting some Wisdom Jade, Thodus and Lesleigh return to the Blank String Faction HQ and go from Rank D (Initiate) to Rank C (Rookie). They are met by one of the factions founding member, Luke who shows them to their magically enchanted room and takes them on a tour. Did someone ask for high-quality voice acting? Well, Luke tries …
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Blank String Dig Through Troll Scat Part IV
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Last time on the Blank String plays Dungeon and Dragons adventure Thodus, Lesleigh and Eddie got into a fight with an Ogre. Thodus is currently lying in the mud bleeding out. Eddie, who is meant to be saving these two, is trapped under a rock. Lesleigh is the last person standing staring down an Ogre and her badge flashes, now she is ready for out …
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Blank String Dig Through Troll Scat Part III
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Continuing their Dungeon and Dragons adventure Thodus and Lesleigh are digging in Troll Scat looking for Wisdom Jade. They met a very friendly Troll who shared a couple of laughs a few wise words of wisdom and helped them jump down his toilet to find some stones. Then suddenly and Ogre shows up, will these 2 Level 1 PCs survive a fight against a mo…
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Blank String Dig Through Troll Scat Part II
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Luke as the wonderful DM is guiding Thodus (played by Matt) and Lesleigh (played by Tim) through the wonderful and glorious game Dungeon and Dragons. Last time the two met Eddie who was their guide for their initiation job to collect Wisdom Jade which is processed by Trolls up Mount Lion Mountain. They start in a heated battle with an Orc before co…
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Blank String Dig Through Troll Scat Part I
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We continue the D&D adventure. Luke taking the helm as an inexperienced Dungeon Master, Matt playing the not too bright yet highly dexterous Half-Orc Ranger named Thodus and Tim playing Lesleigh the Dragonborn Warlock who will, out of nowhere, go from placid to insane in an instant. They meet a Halfling named Eddie who is guiding them on their init…
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Blank String start playing Dungeons and Dragons
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Luke is leading Matt and Tim on the journey into the unknown. A magical world filled with paper, pen, dice and... wait it's all digital? It is still the ultimate level of nerdiness requiring imagination and wit to solve puzzles, kill monsters, save the world and fall in love (probably)? Luke, as the Dungeon Master, helps Matt and Tim design their f…
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Blank String Review Phase III of the MCU
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Luke, Matt and Tim power on through the latest phase of the MCU movies in an epic style. There are some absolute belters in this phase including Black Panther, Guardians of the Galaxy 2, Thor: Ragnarok and 2 Spiderman movies! So whether you have agreed with us or not, it does not matter because the best is yet to come. Much like the ending of phase…
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Blank String Review Phase II of the MCU
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After Luke's low score reviews and Tim's high score review and Matt's a little bit lower than Tim's we decide to continue with Phase II of the MCU. There are some belter movies in Phase II and we all finally agree on at least Guardians of the Galaxy to be one of the best Marvel movies (if not the best). Like last time if you do not want to hear any…
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Blank String Review Phase I of the MCU
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After Luke finished binging all the movies in the MCU he is now ready to give his opinion. Both Matt and Tim have previously seen them all and this makes for a fun trip down memory lane for them. Luke has a lot to say about these movies which are loved by so many people. If you have not seen the Marvel movies before and do not want any spoilers I s…
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Blank String play Zork part 4
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Luke, Matt and Tim continue their quest for knowledge, for power, for glory and honour on the terrific game Zork. Many twist and turns along the way, a surprising plot twist which no one expected. They don't make games like they used to. Join us in what is most likely the finally of the Zork saga.
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Blank String play Zork part 3
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Luke, Matt and Tim are back in the wonderful world of Zork! In part 1 we die by killing ourselves with a sword. In part 2 we die because a troll hit us on the head. Only Zork knows how the three of us will die at the end of this episode. So if you enjoyed listened to the previous two episodes of a character walking around trying to eat, lick and br…
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Blank String play Zork part 2
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Join us Luke, Matt and Tim as we continue this exciting retro adventure! Last time we wondered if we could commit suicide, turns out we could with a glowing sword. Instead of continuing our adventure, we started again! This is really like part 1 all over again, but we get further than the first episode so maybe it is part 1.5. Regardless we push on…
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Blank String play Zork part 1
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Any 80s kid might know about this little gem of a game, Zork. Unfortunately, Luke, Matt and Tim are all 90s kids and never got the chance to play such games. So we downloaded the game published by Infocom and decided we would play through and describe everything in detail to you, the listener. So sit back, relax and listen to the first part of the …
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Blank String go to the BBBQQ, the extra Q is for quarantine
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Are you, like Luke, Matt and Tim stuck in lockdown during BBQ season and are just bored of doing things the traditional way, you know, like on a BBQ? Well fear not, we have solved this problem for you by reinventing the BBQ! That's right! We are here to reignite your passion for the humble BBQ. We want to inspire everyone to go into their back gard…
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Blank Start the first (and probably last) Lock-down Olympics
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Whilst Luke, Matt and Tim have been locked up inside they have turned their attention to something which will no longer be the same, no not that, you dirty dog! The Olympics. So we have rectified this situation and created an Olympics which will rival that of the real Olympics. In my head, I can hear Matt say "This is the real Olympics", sure Matt,…
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Blank String predict the future of life on the outside
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Luke, Matt and Tim are still stuck inside like the rest of you. So they take this opportunity to talk about what life will be like once we are all able to wander the streets free as a bird. We also forget to talk about this at the start and talk about Matt's new haircut for 10 minutes and Mrs Matt makes a cameo to force Matt to wear a hat, it does …
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Blank String and their export quarantine advice
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Luke, Matt and Tim have been affected by this just like everyone else. They thought they would take this time to give everyone some advice on how to quarantine right!
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Blank String get down on dirty
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Luke, Matt and Tim managed to make it to the episode you have all been patiently waiting for. The one where we finally become some super filthy naughty boys. The 69th episode and we talk all things sex. It is great and well-informed information about all things sex. We don't mean to kink shame but maybe not we discover not everything is for everyon…
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Blank String are deserted on a desert island part 3
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The concluding conclusion of the hilarious 3 part series where Matt leads Luke and Tim on a pirate-themed adventure. Last time we finished the adventure Luke and Tim had taken over the ship and for whatever reason, with the help of an alien, sent Matts head back in time to be on the island in a fridge. Now Luke and Tim feel compelled to find out wh…
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Blank String are deserted on a desert island part 2
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Blank String are deserted on a desert island part 1
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Blank String protect everyone on their holidays
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Blank String design an expert secret service
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Blank String Design a Rockin' Theme Park
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Blank String and the Pokemon Xmas Miracle Finale
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Blank String and the Pokemon Xmas Miracle, the first half
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Oh My Gosh! Did you play the new Pokemon yet? Luke and Tim have and are super excited about the game and feel the urge to tell Matt all about the amazing features of this game. After, what can only be seen as a concise and amazing review of Pokemon Luke starts Matt and Tim on their next Pokemon adventure cross annual Xmas episode. Get ready for che…
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Blank String recant with their story of how they got into gaming
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Matt, Luke and Tim are all avid gamers and nothing excites them more than knocking out a quick round of Wii golf or banging some zombie flesh with their shotguns. So let's take a bit of a break from tradition and just have a relaxed episode of 3 dudes who are all pretty much the same age talk about some of the favourite gaming memories and how it a…
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Blank String Start Their Own Country
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Luke, Matt and Tim have just about had enough of the country they are in. So many things could easily be improved. Instead of working on those things and trying to make their current situation better for themselves and everyone else, they start their own country. So it turns out that starting a country is not all that difficult, especially if these…
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Blank String presents: Bread-Time Stories The Finale
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As our journey comes to an epic conclusion, we are left to wonder, how will Matt tie up all of the loose ends he has created? He won't? Well, okay then 🤷♀️
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Blank String presents: Bread-Time Stories Returns
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Our heroes embark on a perilous quest to find the stolen recipe, but just how many walls made of bread can one person eat?
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Blank String presents: Bread-Time Stories
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Matt takes the helm of HMS Blank String and takes the boys on a wild adventure which is about as well planned out as this synopsis. Luke & Tim are a pair of humble bakers with suspiciously vague living arrangements, but when a mysterious stranger visits their bakery their lives are about to change forever! Who? What? Why? Where? And possibly other …
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Blank String create a Godzilla to fight Godzilla part 4 of 3 (final one, honest)
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The final epic show down between Godzilla and Pollozilla. Who will become the new best Godzilla? Listen to how Matt continues to mess around with the rules in order to almost make the episode going over into another episode. Also, how Tim, with his classic "burn all the things" attitude, goes ahead and burns all the things. This one is a wild ride!…
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Blank String work out who will be the best God Father
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Not the movie, that is something else. I heard it is better, but who has time verify? In the meantime, Luke has asked Matt and Tim to be God Father to his latest edition to his family. But who is going to be the better God Father? After a series of gruelling scenarios, we have an answer. I would go so far as to say that they are role models to all …
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Blank String create a Godzilla to fight Godzilla part 3 of 3
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The bit you have all been waiting for, the final showdown. In this epic twist, Luke accidentally ticked off Godzilla, and now Matt and Tim have to pay the price? That's right, they jettison to the moon and cook up Pollozilla to put an end Godzilla. It is the glorious last part of... Nope, Matt and Tim took their time as usual coming up with ways to…
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Blank String create a Godzilla to fight Godzilla part 2 of 3
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In the previous episode Luke, Matt and Tim created their very own Godzilla. It is possibly going to be the greatest Godzilla anyone has ever seen. However in order to prepare for the next episode the gang design a base which will withstand the real Godzilla. I am sure everyone going to Area 51 will want see some of the many defences we have come up…
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Blank String create a Godzilla to fight Godzilla part 1 of 3
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Luke, Matt and Tim take on one of the greatest and well known monsters from cinematic history. In this first part they analyse, with expert precision, what makes a great Godzilla. Failing that they then design a Godzilla of their own in preparation to stop the end of the world from a rampaging oversized lizard!…
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Blank String start several lucrative start ups
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Luke, Matt and Tim rack their brains to come up with the greatest start ups of all time. Well at least Matt and Tim give it a good go, who knows what Luke was on during this episode. If you are either a Shark or a Dragon I suggest you take a cheeky listen and invest hard and fast now before we it is too late.…
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Blank String create child labour 2.0
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Labour is horrible and 66.667% of the men on this podcast have previously been involved in process. But 100% of the men on this podcast say "now is the time to improve child labour". Introducing the new and improved child labour, it's quick, it's painless and it is risk free! What is it? Well listen and find out how Luke, Matt and Tim work out the …
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Blank String predict the ending of Game of Thrones
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Luke, Matt and Tim discuss the last season of Game of Thrones. This episode was recorded early into the season (after episode 2) but will be released well after the last episode has aired. You will be amazed how accurate these three rad dudes are. I mean, especially Matt who was most probably the closest to what actually happened. You will listen t…
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Blank String create a cure for insomnia
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Tim gets a new bed or something like that. It's not important because after help from Matt and Luke they design the perfect sleeping conditions. So if you have been awake for too long and need a night of sleep, just implement the solution we have for you and you will soon be in the land of Nod. Or just listen to this episode, it's an either/or situ…
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Blank String create the next biggest super hero franchise
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Luke, Matt and Tim want a slice of the blockbuster super hero movie franchise. They take it upon themselves to create the greatest super hero franchise ever and show that is easy to do! Introducing Sauce Man, or was it Source Dude? Now let the money rain in.
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Blank String design a cooking competition
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After an extra long series of yet another baking competition Luke claims that Blank String can do a better job. So together with Matt and Tim, they design a cooking competition like no one has ever seen. It's dangerous, it's thrilling, it also has a bonus rounds where humans step aside and dogs take over as chefs. What more could you want?…
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